How I started unschooling

When I chose unschooling for my eldest son I was following my heart. He wasn’t doing a “school refusal” thing, because he was only four years old. He started young with “preschool refusal” instead. When he braced himself inside the car when I pulled up outside the preschool and refused to step onto the pavement I knew that he’d made an important choice. His words were simple and compelling.“I just want to say home with you and Lxxxx” (his baby brother).My mind was coming up with so many reasons why I should say No to his request. I had no clue about home eduation. I’d met a homeschooler for the first time just two weeks before – that’s how clueless I was. I hadn’t read a single article or book and I didn’t even know if it was legal or not. I’d never heard of unschooling.I had a career as a university lecturer that I’d been committed to for 15 years. I had finished a PhD just two years before after working on it part-time for 8 years. The idea of leaving all that behind was very scary. I’d been thoroughly indoctrinated into the school mindset and the conventional education system. My mind was trained in competition and comparisons, the work ethic, discipline, memorisation and regurgitation and above all – self judgement. How was I going to get free of all of that?? I had absolutely no idea. I knew that I didn’t want to force my son into a preschool or school that he didn’t want to attend. I knew in my heart that he just didn’t fit in the school system – and that wasn’t about to change any time soon. So I said Yes, to my son and I drove away from the preschool and went home to figure out what to do next. That was the beginning of a 15 year Unschooling adventure for my family. It was a wild adventure in choosing freedom. Freedom for my sons from coercion, competition, rules, punishment and being told what to do and what to learn. Freedom for them to be true to themselves and to follow their own interests and desire to explore and learn in their own way. What was the wildest part of the whole unschooling adventure? My unlearning journey. Unlearning all of the indoctrination, programming and beliefs about parenting and education ………….. and then continuing on from there to unlearn the patterns of making comparisons with others and wallowing in self judgement. The freedom that I experience now after all that unlearning is just magic. I recommend unschooling and I love to write about it and support others in their journey because I’m passionate about the peace, joy and freedom that it can bring for all members of the family – not just the kids. This is an amazing journey for parents too. And my sons are fine. They’re still doing what they’ve always done best, which is being true to themselves.